Subject: Good morning
>
>
>
> A couple, both born the same year and month, were celebrating their
> 60th birthdays. During the celebration, a fairy appeared and said that
> because they had been so loving she would grant them each one wish.
>
> Very excited, the wife said that since she had already visited most of
> North America in her RV she would like to visit Europe. The fairy
> waved her magic wand; airline tickets instantly appeared in her hand.
>
> Then it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment, then said with
> a sly look, "Well, I'd like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."
> The fairy waved her wand, and presto, he was 90.
>
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>
> Three convicts were on the way to prison. They were each allowed to
> take one item with them to help them occupy their time while
> incarcerated.
> On the bus, one turned to another and said, "So, what did you bring?"
>
> The second convict pulled out a box of paints and stated that he
> intended to paint anything he could. He wanted to become the "Grandma
> Moses of Jail." Then he asked the first, "What did you bring?"
>
> The first convict pulled out a deck of cards and grinned and said, "I
> brought cards. I can play poker, solitaire, gin, and any number of
> games."
>
> The third convict was sitting quietly aside, grinning to himself. The
> other two took notice and asked, "Why are you so smug? What did you
> bring?"
>
> The guy pulled out a box of tampons and smiled. He said, "I brought these."
>
> The other two were puzzled and asked, "What can you do with those?"
>
> He grinned and pointed to the box and said, "Well according to the
> box, I can go horseback riding, swimming, roller-skating...."
>
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>
>
> A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted
> a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very
> reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After
> becoming very frustrated with the 'no haggle' attitude of one of the
> shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, 'Maybe I'll just go out and catch my
> own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!'
>
> The shopkeeper said, 'By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out
> and catch yourself a big one!'
>
> Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on
> catching herself an alligator. Later in the day, the shopkeeper is
> driving home, when he spots the young woman standing waist deep in the
> water, shotgun in hand.
>
> Just then, he sees a huge 9 foot alligator swimming quickly toward
> her. She takes aim, kills the creature and with a great deal of effort
> hauls it on to the swamp bank. Laying nearby were several more of the
> dead creatures.
>
> The shopkeeper watches in amazement. Just then the blonde flips the
> alligator on it's back, and frustrated, shouts out, 'Damn it, this one
> isn't wearing any shoes either!'